Wednesday, March 5, 2014

We gladly feast on those who would subdue us. Not just pretty words. - Morticia Addams

So the results of my biopsy are in.

I DO NOT have the dreaded Coeliac Disease.

FFeeeeeyouuuuuu.

I probably should have waited for the actual diagnosis before I downloaded the Coeliac Australia app for $10 & bought the "coeliac for Dummies" book.  I am not joking. What a dickhead.

Dr B gave me the horrifying news that according to the 50 million blood tests, pap smears & having the tube stuck down into my guts that I am

COMPLETELY HEALTHY.

I was actually disappointed that I wasn't coeliac. I know I know I should be grateful. Coeliac is a total prick of a disease & I should be jumping up & down with joy & fist pumping the air.
I guess I just wanted an ANSWER.

So, why then am I always so tired, my legs ache & are sore to touch, my stomach is always bloated, my back aches, fluffies have the power to kill indoor plants & my girlie bits always seem to be in a constant state of slight period pain?????


DR B DIAGNOSIS:   FUCKED IF HE KNOWS.

 
 
His solution:  Watch what I eat and do more exercise.

So, here I am back at the beginning.

I must admit I had a big Black Dog day yesterday. I pretty bad one actually where I literally sat in my car in the medical centre car park and thought " I just want to disappear. Vanish. I don't want to be here anymore".
Before you all freak out I will tell you that even though I have my very dark days I would never every do anything to harm myself.  I have the best medicine in the world waiting for me at home.

You Tube.

Just kidding.

The Big Fella.

Poor bugger. I got home & just went all Exorcist on him & spewed forth my feelings of sadness & despair onto his big fuzzy face. 
Then he gave me my medicine.
A huge bear hug while telling me "It's OK. You don't have to do everything. You don't need to please everyone. You WILL feel better."
He then went & bought us yummy Thai food while I surfed Pinterest for motivating quotes & pictures of French bulldogs.



Today my brain has recalibrated. I'm cool daddy-o.

I am tracking my food with Calorie King and have made a pact with TBF that I will walk
EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY .....
for a MINIMUM of half an hour.

I will stop beating myself up because I can't be everything to everybody.
I can't please everyone all the time.
Starting again..... and
GO.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

3 comments:

  1. Kate Miss KittenMarch 5, 2014 at 7:25 PM

    Gorgeous gal keep your chin up. I had a day like this very recently and we are all entitled to them. They are there to help us cleanse out the bad shit and take steps towards figuring out the next move. Im lucky in the respect that I too, have a big fella of my own and he helps me see the light when I have my Linda Blair moments :) Love ya guts and hope said guts are feeling better today xxx

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  2. If you are looking for some different recipes to try. LolaBerry.com and DrLibby.com. I actually heard Dr Libby speaking at Wanderlust the other day, talking about how females are suffering unnecessarily due to what they live, and trying to take on too much (living in the red zone). She's got a bunch of books. I'm trying out both of their cookbooks - lola berry because she looked amazing and seemed like such an awesome person, and also dr libby suggesting that real food could be prepared in such a way that was heaps more nutritious for us. In case it helps :) I know I've had a bunch of tests run to work out why I was so tired and they came back with nothing useful!! So annoying.

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